We haven't always been a 'homeschooling' family.
When our eldest, Havanah, turned five, off she went to primary school. She'd been to preschool the year before and was all for going to 'big school'.
When the school year began, Havanah was super excited. A few weeks in, her mood started to change. She wasn't enjoying it the way she once had, and she begged us each night not to send her to school the following day. "Why, Varny? You love school!", we'd say to her. "I don't love school. I always get into trouble." Havanah's teacher was great at keeping us up-to-date and was often grabbing us at pickup to discuss how Havanah was having trouble paying attention and following instruction in class.
Only 6 weeks into the school year and I was being flown to Sydney with pregnancy complications. We did our best to continue sending Havanah to school, but when Carter was born ten weeks early, we knew he'd be in the NICU for a while, and it was more important to us to have our family together, in one place. So the kids were packed up into a backpack each and brought to live with us at Hope Cottage, at Penrith's Nepean Hospital. We kept the school up-to-date and they continued to send work to the hospital so Havanah wouldn't fall behind.
Eventually, the principal contacted us to talk about the option of taking Havanah out of school and starting her back the following year when she turns six, as this is the legal school age in NSW. We took a week to really think about it.
She'd already made friends in her class. She'd have to start all over again and her friends would be in a different year level. That week, Carter had a rough few days with an infection and needed a blood transfusion. We weren't sure of anything, other than how important our family unit was - our mind was instantly made up. We contacted the school and had Havanah removed. It was more important for us all to be together during this time than to be worried about what was happening at school.
Havanah was still interested in learning and we had all this school work for her, so we continued to incorporate her education into our routine at Hope Cottage.
When Carter was finally discharged, at 102 days old, we started to make plans for the future. Finally, our life didn't revolve around the NICU or SCN.
I remember sitting down at the kitchen table with Havanah as she did some maths work. We always joke about how she has her dad's short attention span. This day, it became very apparent just how quickly she can lose track of what she's supposed to be doing.
"So if you add this number to this number, how many will you have?" I ask her. "Mommy, did you know that cats eat mice?" After explaining a cat's urge to hunt, we were back on track again. "Ok, why don't you continue on with this page and I'll grab us a little snack". I sat down with our snack to find that Havanah had drawn a picture of our cat, Callie, chasing a mouse along the bottom of her workbook. "Varny, what are you doing honey? We're not drawing." Her face dropped and she was noticeably upset, "Am I going to be in trouble like at school?" "Sweetie, your teacher just wants you to be able to learn. You can't learn if you're not paying attention." "I know.. it's just.. sometimes I get bored"
Over the next few weeks I paid more attention to how Havanah learnt, rather than how I taught her. Havanah loved learning and she was picking it all up so quickly. As soon as she understood the material, she was bored and wanting to move onto the next thing. "Honey, we can't just decide you know it and move on.. you have to answer all the questions on the page." "But I already know them. Why can't we just learn a different thing that I don't know?" "Because that's not how it works at school." Hearing myself say it out loud, it seemed like a no-brainer.
The more Havanah's teacher spoke to her about not paying attention, or for not following instruction, the more Havanah associated being in 'trouble', with school. Don't get me wrong! Havanah's school was amazing and her teacher was wonderful!
The second her teacher told me she has to regularly speak to Havanah, I knew exactly what she meant. She's the same at home, and we are constantly having to remind her to pay attention or follow instructions.
We packed up and finished for the day.
"I wish you could be my teacher." That night, I spoke to John about what I'd been noticing with Havanah's method of learning.
"I really think we should look into homeschooling her. She needs someone to sit with her and remind her of what she's doing but, once she gets it, she knows it! She's so clever.. she just needs something that's specific to the way she takes in information."
John and I got into an argument that night.
He was worried about the social aspect of it, as most people are, and about the amount of work I would have to put in, "with Carter's care and appointments on top of having two other kids, homeschooling will just be too much." We agreed to look into it more and better understand what would be involved, as well as the other options we had, in terms of socialisation.
After a week of intense research and speaking with other homeschooling families in our area, there was no doubt in our minds that this was perfect for our family and our lifestyle.
We spent the next few weeks putting together a classroom and working on lesson plans specific to the kid's interests and how they learn, deciding to include material for 3-year-old Brooklyn as well.
Some days it's tricky. Carter's currently 5-months-old and has begun teething, so life is a little all over the place. But we're enjoying this journey so much. Havanah and Brooklyn are both excelling and they aren't limited to what the other kids are learning.
We chose a more 'eclectic' style of homeschooling, deciding that the 'school-at-home' approach wasn't practical for our lifestyle and the way we choose to raise our children.. but that's another blog post!
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